the following is a word for word transcript of a conversation that took place in my car last night as i gave a ride home to my english-challenged cuban co-worker:

lazaro: oh, my friend. you see?
me: see what?
lazaro: mmm. (points to girl in car next to us)
me: oh yea. nice.
lazaro: yes. (makes kissy noises at girl) i have...uh....the...the warm heart? yes?
me: i can see that.
lazaro: you think she is girl?
me: what?
lazaro: it is crazy, my friend. this world it is crazy.
me: what do you mean?
lazaro: you know...ahhh...when you see one woman...ahh...you say "this is one woman"...but then...aaahhhh...you see it is fucking fag.
me: whoa. those are called transexuals or transvestites.
lazaro: oh yes. fucking fags, man.

wow.