wow. what? yea...wow.

yea so i was thinking about submitting my page to that rate-yer-diary thing but then decided against it cuz i remembered that this thing sucks a carabou's slimy cock. if anyone has any suggestions on how i could spruce this thing up a bit and get off of the "red with nutsack-swaying squirrel" motif i got goin here, i'd be more than happy to recieve said suggestions. as long as it envolves no effort on my part.

we had a big gnarly snowstorm a couple of days ago and the entire town was covered in snow/ice/death but i had all kinds of work/school/non-death to partake in that day so i braved the harsh elements to further education and finacial stability or lack thereof and anyway i was getting really pissed at all the people who would like zoom the fuck past me on these icy ass roads like victoria sylvstead playmate of the year was givin free head in a booth or something but only for the next fifteen minutes and the point is they were driving quite fast and recklessly and i was just waiting all day for someone to die that wasn't me and then finally at around 9 at night when i was comin home from school this total cocknocker flew past me in this little super-fast tiny-wheel $569,947 rims havin iluminecent tubing round the licence plate with a x-treme audio sticker on the back winshield type of car and the light turned red and he slammed on his brakes and of course flew out into the middle of the intersection and this minivan hit him and i'm sorry but i laughed cuz seriously dood, what the hell did he think he was doin? and those people bitch about havin to pay higher insurance rates. psh.

one time i was sittin around with all these macho guys i didn't really know, i forget why i was even there, but we were all drinkin and whatever and there was some physically attractive female on t.v. and they all started whistling and talking aboots how they'd like to stick it to her and whatnot and then this conversation dove into the realms of other attractive famous girls and they argued about which one was hotter and blah blah blah and one of the guys asked me if i could bang the shit out of anyone who would it be and i said "audrey hepburn circa 1954...but i would rather make sweet sweet love to her as opposed to bang the shit outta her" and everybody looked at me for a minute and then nobody talked to me again for the rest of the night but i drank all their beer so it was a win-win situation.

oh yes i forgot. if you have not been to this page, for the love of ray ramano's nose, go there now. the official ninja homepage