my fortune cookie says "innocence and time, once lost, can never be regained." man, way to make me think and ruin my whole night, assholes. what a bummer. just gimmie some fuckin lotto numbers and call it a night.

discovery!
if you're like me, you like food that tastes good. if that statement's true, you would love what i am eating right now. they're these things kinda like pizza rolls...or maybe more like jalapeno poppers. anywho, they're filled with macaroni and cheese! holy fuck!
my mom said i should eat them with peas and i told her she was out of her fucking mind. crazy old bat...

hanson is playing at my work tonight. i hope i don't pop any boners.

shit! that reminds me! last night rosanne barr preformed at my work and at the end she took off her clothes and tap-danced in her underwear! x-treme!!!

i just got another fortune cookie to return my spirits to the upright/locked position after that last one and this one said "your best investment is in yourself." sweet. i'm gonna ride this "me" thing out and then sell all my shares just before the market takes a dive. haha! i'll be stinkin rich!