oh dear god.

yea, so just in case you were sitting around wondering what really funny shit is, let me help you out. it's this. (<- click there dumbass) so now you know.

one time i was talkin shit about IHOP cuz, well, quite frankly, it sucks balls and is not worthy to lick the dingleberries from the choade of Dennys, and anyway rachel started singing a song and it went like this: "i hop you hop we all hop for...pancakes?" and it was totally funny i swear.

late breaking news from the peacock front:

so we all remember mrs. peacock, right? yea...so i'm in her class the other day and as per usual, she was displaying all the common sense of an afghanni muslim working in a VFW soup kitchen. (that was not a racist joke, by the way. figure it out.) so when i walk in to class 10 minutes late i see her over a piece of paper showing the entire class how to use a crayon. ..........uh huh. so anyway, she gives us this assignment where we have to divide a big gnarly peice of paper into like 20 squares and use a different technique in each one. some examples: pencil lines of varying weight and length, ink, watercolor with ink, watercolor with crayon, watercolor with pencil, paper cut and crinkled. yea...so we had to use construction paper. cut and crinkled construction paper. .............................................................yup. since i have no respect for this woman whatsoever i ripped a peice of bright blue construction paper, folded it three times, and glued it on my page so i could work with the india ink some more. she walked by and looked at it with that wonted expression of "i have been dead for the last 12 years...excuse me...i must go drink the blood of one of my 30 cats so that i may live another day" so i turned around and said in the most blatently obvious tone of sarcasm "so is that or is that not thee most crinkled peice of construction paper you have ever laid eyes on?" and she looked at me with all seriousness and said "no it's not." i said "i dare you to defy me" once again obviously joking. so she then led me around the class showing me students who crumpled up paper and glued it to paper better than me. it was reeeeeally funny but more stupid and come to think of it i want that 3 hours of my life back.

eew...cold coffee.

i am completely addicted to the discovery channel now. it is the greatest thing in the history of mankind. here is a mad rap about it:

hatin on my shit just cuz i rock the parcel

if you knew what that meant you'd be no better off, naw

even if i explained it, you wouldn't understand it

so don't be walkin up in this bitch tryin to represent that shit

cuz you know that if you did i would fuck you up faster

than that whack-ass slut from plastic surgery disasters

just for the record that ain't no refrence to no dead kennedys

that's some shit straight up representin TLC

A&E, Discovery channel tutenkammen repro-

ductive system of north american mammals

it seems to be

it's ok with me

ends with "BS"

starts with a "P"

on your t.v.

viva educational programming

fuckin a. i gotta go call "cash money millionaires" now and tell em i'm down.

rock the parcel.

uh huh.

word.