attention people of earth.

here are a few things you may not be aware of that you should in fact be aware of:

monkey bone is quite possibly the worst movie ever.

i got crazy two nites ago and i ate a cheeseburger and i was up all nite puking.

page 104 of the march issue of lucky magazine tells you how to wear the season's flirtiest look.

wild cherry pepsi does not contain cherries but it does contain pepsi.

i have listened to nothing but tmbg's song 'dr. worm' for 3 days now.

axle bit my ear this morning whilst resting upon my shoulder and i jerked in pain causing him to fall off my aforementioned shoulder. luckily for him, he has seen tom cruise's rock climbing scene in mission impossible 2 and therefore knew the correct way to handle this situation was to bite down harder on my ear and dangle there from it.

my ear hurts.

on my surveys page it shows that i filled out my own survey however this is a falsehood. my friend lira was over at our apartment with brian face for a dinner/cocktail party (we are classy folk) and she filled it out whilst logged in under my name. just thought that should be on the record so her answers can never condemn me in a court of law.

as i was typing the little paragraph about axle i could hear him thrashing around in his cage. then there was silence. as i got to the words "she filled it out" in the preceeding paragraph i noticed axle's bell sounded a bit too loud. this was because he was standing at my feet. he somehow pushed the bottom part of his litter box up against the side of his cage so the bottom tray moved out slightly and he was able to squeeze through and enter my room for speaking about his faults. that was disconcerning to say the least.

wet hot american summer is one of the greatest movies ever.

last nite roach and i watched the simpsons. then we had sex. then we sat up till 3 in the morning naked, drinking st paulie girl, chain smoking, and playing a dungeons and dragons game on ps2. related story: life is good.

rock the parcel.

uh huh.

word.