um...oh yes.

"parcel" backwards is "le crap."

ranch dressing makes everything taste better....except grass. well, live and learn, huh?

ok, so i was in the peacocks class and we're doing a chapter on line usage right now and i was getting super pissed off cuz all these paintings just look like some jackass got gum stuck on his shoe and wiped it on a canvas and sold it for 3.5 million doll-hairs. so peacock is droning on about things she can't possibly comprehend as per usual, and she asks me what this picture displays. i wanted to say "this displays the epitome of western culture in that some stuffed shirt filthy rich cock sucker with as much understanding of art as you, peacock, paid a disgusting amount of money for this so he could hang it in his yacht. fuck this i'm going to dennys." and then out loud i said "it sucks" and she said "why?" and i said "are you looking at it? it sucks. bad." and then she asked another guy and he was like "i dunno...i just looks childish." and her response was "but the guy who did this is a famous painter...so this just isn't anyone" and i said "oh ok. and that makes it good, huh." and i'm sure she probably kept talking after that but i got up and went to the cafeteria to get some coffee and i was thinking about that shit and how real artists never get any recognition because everything nowadays has to be either neo-classic or it has to tug on the heartstrings or it has to be some shitty still life or whatever and i started thinking about how a long time ago rachel took a picture of this girl for her photography class and in it the girl was facing sideways and she was nekkid and she had her arm up behind her head posing all majestically and rachel had rubbed a bunch of potting soil all over her armpit and i thought that was the absolute coolest thing ever and then it came to me. i am going to start a series of photos that will be yet another social commentary aboots how we as americans view sex and beauty. you can take anyone, slap some makeup on them, adjust the lighting and make them look beautiful. but how hard would it be to take someone already beautiful and make them look disgustingly ridiculous? so this is what i am doing. i have recruited a few girls thus far and they seem pretty excited about it. there will be pictures of beautiful girls in bikinis in the middle of the desert posing seductively wearing arm floaties, goggles and a snorkle. rachel has agreed to pose nude laying on red satin sheets naked with ashtrays filled with butts covering both of her nipples. there will be pictures of girls getting ready for prom in their beautiful prom gowns with their hair in rollers, wax on their upper lip, plucking their eyebrows making a face of slight pain into the mirror. there will be beautiful girls in little pink balerina tutus studying the back of boxes of tampons in the grocery store. there will be girls naked poking out from behind trees wearing darth vader masks. it should be...nay...it will be radical. if you happen to be an attractive female in the reno/vegas/northern california area (or you know someone who is) and you want to be a part of this, rock my inbox and we'll get this shit on the road.

rock the parcel.

uh huh.

word.